Mike's musings

A romantic day away

(backposting) Yay - for the second time in 5 years, Moo and I are off for a night away on our own without the girls. We went to a Marriott country club place, spent time sleeping, drinking tea, knitting, playing cribbage, having time with just each other, and just generally hanging out. We had a lovely time, and it was time we really needed, particularly because I'm off to Australia on Thursday.

Labels: Moo

Time alone

(backposting) No, not on my own. With Moo. As of this week, we have regular time scheduled without the kids for the first time in 5 years. It's just an hour and a half while the girls do ballet on a Saturday morning (Miri's joined Jo's class), but it's actual time. We went for tea/coffee and cake, and I rather wasted some of the time by having a haircut, but it's there, and it's regular. Yay!

And afterwards we headed off to Freeport, where they have a bouncy trampoline-bungee thing which we'd promised Jojo she could have a go on if I went to Australia - as she did when I went to the US for 2 weeks last year. It turned out that Miri's now big enough, too, so they both had a lovely time. We headed off to Tesco for a big shop, came home and had a picnic outside in the garden, and then did some basic gardening (including the second lawn mowing of the year).

The evening, however, was BBQ time. We went round to the Plants, where they barbecued for the four of us adults and the four kids. Well, more like for six adults. And the kids hardly ate. So we stuffed ourselves. A good evening with Si and D and the kids.

Labels: barbecue, friends, Moo

Haircut - and a lovely meal

(backposting) You don't want to know about my haircut, do you? Well, I had one, anyway, so there.

In the evening, Moo and I went out for a lovely meal at Scutchers. Wine-wise, we had a lovely Pouilly Fumé and a beautiful Fleurie (Domanie de Madone). I also had an interesting "black muscat": a red dessert wine - though it tasted like a standard white wine, with a little extra something. It was great to have some unbounded time with Moo, just to chat and enjoy each other's company, with some good food and wine. Usually we only have a little time over lunch or coffee, and we need to be back to look after the girls, but as my parents were looking after them, we had as much time as we needed.

Labels: food, Moo

Actual illness

(backposting) All right, so Jo was properly ill today, poor thing. Real throwing up. So she had a day at home, and Mel managed Miri. On a couple of occasions I came and worked downstairs with a very quiet and compliant Jo, so Mel could deliver/collect Miri from pre-school.

Sounds like Moo needed restraining in a meeting this afternoon. Sometimes I wish I could there. Other times I come to my senses and am glad I'm not.

Labels: illness, jojo, Moo

Moo - more work

Well, it looks like Moo's got more work coming. Hopefully not too much this time, and it's actually good that they (seem to) have won (at least part of) the tender, but she's been working very hard recently, and I want to keep an eye on how much she's doing.

Obviously possible trips to Zurich (likely), Sydney (looking fairly probable) and the Middle East (currently conjecture) aren't a _great_ help in this context.

Labels: Moo, travel

All loony for Moo

(backposting) Her job is being rather loony. So, chocolate, coffee, alcohol as required.

Labels: Moo

I have a lovely, lovely wife

(backposting) Beset by gout today. Not a good thing, and probably brought on by the cheese, chocolate and red wine last night, so partly my own fault. Jim and Nina were off to a wedding around 1030, and we'd been planning to take the girls and Jim and Nina's kids to a farm or some such, but I really wasn't capable. So Moo took them on her own. 4 of them. Ages: 4, 3, 2, 1. Apparently they behaved very well, but I'm still very much impressed and grateful. I got some more sleep, read through the mortgage extension offer (we're going to have actual, proper radiators installed, to keep the the entire house above freezing all winter this year (hopefully)!) and did some bits and pieces. What a lovely woman Moo is, and I love her very much.

Labels: children, gout, Moo

Necking

(backposting) Had a bit of a run-in with my mother-in-law when I lost my temper today. Silly on my part, and mainly because I'm a bit stressed about the new job starting so soon, etc., but it wasn't good.

On the other hand, Moo and I went out for a lovely meal, just the two of us. This is an all-too-rare occurrence, but as the new job is definite, and we have (for a chance) got some money in the bank, we decided to take up the offer of some childcare, and headed out. By the time we got back at 2200, everyone was asleep!

One thing that's been fantastic is how supportive my clergy colleagues have been throughout the job process. They've prayed for me while I've been without a job, and they've been very, very accommodating about my needing to change services around as I'm going to be away for 2 Sundays (I'll be leaving home early this Sunday to catch a flight at noon). Many thanks to them for everything.

Ah, yes, and the necking thing? I sent a Twitter and Facebook update saying that I was going to take Moo for a really good neck. My phone decided that this was more likely than "meal" (what sort of guy does it take me for?), so I had to send a second one to retract...

Labels: clergy, food, Moo

Wedding anniversary

So, obviously, what with it being our 14th wedding anniversary, I went on a clergy trip to Canterbury. Actually, Moo was at work during the day, and I was back in time to put the girls to bed, so that's what I did. Each year we (the team) go on an away day: just a chance to talk, discuss, and just have social time together. And this year we went to Canterbury. It was my first chance to spend much time with Sally, our new curate, and we had a great time. Lots to discuss, and lots of theological discussion, particularly over lunch and in the car there and back.

I don't think I've ever visited the cathedral before, and it's _big_. Lots of beautiful things in there, including a lovely chalice and paten belonging to a C12th archbishop (Hubert Walter), some amazing wall paintings, and some great stained glass. I particularly liked the early glass and the C20th glass (of which I bought a couple of postcards for Jo and Miri). I wandered around mostly on my own, and was struck again by the connection I felt with priests through the ages. Hundreds - thousands - have worshipped there, and having the continuity is very special to me at the moment.

Now that the girls are in bed and asleep, we've enjoyed a shoulder of lamb and some chocolates. And soon it'll be time for the 3rd episode of the latest Torchwood.

I hope to get more sleep tonight than last: I stayed up till around 1200 with some wine, chatting on FB to Gary and Sally, and then Jo woke me up around 0515...

Labels: marriage, Moo, priest

A beautiful day, in lots of ways

Didn't feel too good to start with, but doing some ironing, and then some serious gardening, helped. In the sun, pulling up nettles and brambles - some time indoors, watching the Cup Final - outside again, doing the nettle and bramble thing - indoors - you get the idea. We barbecued for lunch, then we put the paddling pool out in the garden: all the things that you're supposed to do with kids, but you have to wait a while for them to be old enough to do.

Then the kids went to bed. Early. And we sat outside in the garden, reading the papers, drinking wine, eating crisps and cold, barbecued sausages, chatting and hardly being able to hear ourselves think because of the sound of birdsong. Moo's not annoyed or grumpy in this picture: she's just concentrating on the paper.

We went inside when it got too cold, after a fantastic day. And it's only May.

Labels: family, happiness, Moo

Mothering Sunday

Moo didn't have as good a Mothering Sunday as I'd have liked. There were cards and a pressie from the girls, but I had to do the 0800 and the 1000, and as Miri had been sick in the night, I didn't expect them to come. And in the afternoon, she spent 3 and a half hours at a dance rehearsal with Jo. She spent some nice time with the girls, though, and we're currently watching The Wire season four.

Also in the news:
Liverpool beat Aston Villa 5-0. This takes us to second in the Premiership behind Man. U., and ahead on goal difference.
Jade Goody died. I preached on this. She wasn't a perfect woman, by a long way, and many people had real issues with her, and fair enough. But she taught us something about facing death with honesty, and about how to make provision for your children. People are now talking about cancer - nasty cancers, in fact - and about baptism. And about how to die. These are all good things. I compared her with Mary, mother of our Lord. I think that's fair.

Labels: church, death, Moo

Moo's birthday

(backposting) So we went out for lunch to the White Hart in Great Yeldham. We had a good meal and I discussed my health whilst browsing wikipedia on my phone, looking for illnesses from which I may be suffering. Now that the gout has started to subside, my most serious complaint is a dangerous and acute form of masculine hypochondria. This debilitating condition could have derailed the important time we spent together on Moo's birthday - special time for her - but luckily she's able to laugh at me. Not just able, it seems, but more than willing to do so. She'll soon learn better if my condition worsens, I can tell you.

Labels: birthday, illness, Moo

Sleeping in

(backposting) It's not that often that we get to sleep in, but I was up and dressed by 1106, which isn't too bad. Not that much later for Moo. We had a lovely meal at The Punchbowl, and then headed up to The Wool Clip, where Moo bought some wool (one lot at my suggestion, as I hope she's going to use it to knit something for me). Then back to the cottage to finish off the 2nd series of The Wire. What a great programme.

When we phoned the girls, Miri said "I miss you, too" in response to me. It's lovely when they learn to speak properly.

Labels: family, girls, Moo, television

Holiday

So, I'm up in a cottage in Dent with my lovely wife. I've been watching Ice Age on DVD, the cricket (West Indies-England test match) and random religious broadcasting on Sky, and the news. And Moo's been knitting.

And that's it. We've not been looking after the girls. Because Kate and Mac (my parents-in-law) are.

It's the first time that Moo and I have spent a night away together without the girls since Jo was born, now 4 years ago. We know this isn't good, but we're so pleased to be here, and just relaxing and spending easy times with each other. Many thanks to Kate and Mac.

Oh, and I've managed to get this machine online despite not having the relevant documentation, remembering stuff I last had to do around 3 years ago, about which I'm pretty chuffed.

Labels: geekery, girls, holiday, Moo

*Cough*

At Moo's insistence, I went to the doctor today to show her my cough. She seemed to like it enough to want to listen to it via my back, using a stethoscope. It must have impressed her significantly, as she gave me a prize to take away: a week's worth of antibiotics. These will make me loopy for approximately 7 days.

Other exciting news today: I asked Moo to marry me 16 years ago. And she said yes. I was down on one knee, on King's College bridge (in Cambridge) with a diamond ring which I'd bought with money I'd borrowed from the college (though I'd not told them why). We weren't feeling desperately romantic, so I gave her a bag (pink) for her new netbook (pink), and she gave me the series 2 and 3 of The Wire, which we've enjoyed watching immensely. We popped out for lunch, and in the evening had sausages, mash and baked beans: a staple stay-at-home treat. And we finished off series 1 of The Wire, which was an excellent way to finish off the evening.

Labels: illness, love, Moo

Preaching and nerves

I'm usually a little apprehensive before preaching, and that's as it should be. But I was really very nervous before preaching this afternoon. We had civic Remembrance Sunday service, starting at the war memorial in the town, and then processing up with the uniformed organisations to a service in the church. The different churches in the town were represented, and I'd agreed to preach.

I chose to preach the following trajectory:

• as a Christian, I can say that death isn't the end, because Christ died for us;
• that doesn't mean the death is good: the loss of life, more specifically, the loss of lives, saddens God, as it does us. Those who have died would not just have been great musicians, politicians, writers, etc.: the people about whom you hear "their death was such a loss". Most of them would have been bakers, and waiters, and secretaries, and administrators, and fathers, and mothers, and husbands, and lovers and partners;
• we should be ashamed - not just a citizens of our town - but as all humans should be, because things like the situation in the Congo, and Afghanistan and Iraq happen despite Omaha Beach, and the Somme and Passchendaele;
• but today isn't about being ashamed; it's about appreciating the fact that we can be bakers, and waiters, and secretaries, and administrators, and fathers, and mothers, and husbands, and lovers and partners because the people who went before and gaves their lives and health for us did so. We should be proud of them. We have a debt that we cannot fully repay to them, but we can partly repay them by remembering them: with love, and with dignity, and with pride.

I think it went down OK, and was fairly accessible to the children in the congregation.

Moo brought Jo and Miri to the 1000 service, and Mark and Jen turned up, too. I'd not met her, and she seems good.

Labels: friends, girls, Moo, preaching, services

A bad decision

I made a bad decision today. CME (Continuing Ministerial Education) day in Chelmsford on Funerals and Bereavement. Jo threw up at 0900. I left, after consulting Moo, at 0940.

I got to the meeting at 1025, 5 minutes before I thought it was due to start. I'd had an unhappy drive. When I got there, they were well underway, and I was nearly in tears. I knew from the second I walked into the room that I was in the wrong place, and 15 minutes later, at the first opportunity, I excused myself and headed home.

This was the right thing to do. Things are getting too close to wrong, Moo and I are very tired, and she's been spending too much time looking after the girls while I've been spending too much time doing things which aren't being with her and the girls.

My first ministry is to my family.

Labels: family, ministry, Moo

Emotional

Two reasons:

1. we had a confirmation this afternoon, in Halstead church. We had 21 candidates (of whom 4 were baptised in the same service), and 2 people received into the Church of England from another church. I was emotional because it has a lot in common with my ordination service, and that's not that long ago. It brought lots back, and, however, odd it feels, I keep knowing that I'm doing the right thing.

2. I missed the girls' bedtime again. Second night in a row, and although Moo was fantastic about it, she shouldn't have to be. It's not so much missing putting the girls to bed, as much as the fact that Moo ends up doing it on her own, and it can be really hard. This made me feel sad.

I'm doing too much at the moment, and I'm not sure how to calm it down. But I need to.

Labels: girls, god, Moo

Supervision, and back to work: and an anniversary

(backposting) Spent most of the morning going through emails and getting pretty much up-to-date again. The afternoon was taken up mainly writing up a report on an audit I've recently done. Or getting most of it done, anyway.

I also had a supervision with John. We worked on preparing for the confirmation on Sunday (I'll be the Bishop's Chaplain), then on my first baptism (my first sacrament!) next month. And also about the past two weeks, when I've been without Communion or any other church interaction. This is common for many, and rare for clergy, and it's been an interesting and useful experience. I've found the Daily Offices (morning and evening prayer) very important during this time, and have found it tough. Something I'll be reflecting on.

On another topic, Moo came up to my office around 0930, and mentioned the fact that today is our engagement anniversary. 16 years, we decided. Luckily, she'd forgotten, too. But we managed to get Mel to baby-sit, and arranged to go out for a curry in Clare. It was only around 1715 that we remembered that it wasn't our engagement anniversary (which as we both knew very well is on the 13th Feb., not October). But we went out anyway. We're rubbish.

Labels: church, Moo, work

Old work colleagues

Popped round to Citrix today as I had a meeting in Cambourne. Put a clerical collar on (had one in the glove compartment). Fun and good to see some of the folks from years ago.

Moo's back home, we're both knackered.

Labels: clergy, Moo