Mike's musings

Link and Malokai

So, it's been some time since my last post, but today we had Malokai playing and worshipping at St Andrew's, Halstead. They were great, and I really enjoyed the music and their witness, too. There were very genuine, played well, and did a great set. Alex, the front man, talked about joy a lot, and that really worked for me. We had a few walk-ins, too, which was exciting, and we hope to have them back. Well done to Victoria for getting them in.

Labels: music, worship

Macca

(backposting) I went to a school reunion bash thing in a club in London (not as posh as it sounds), and who should walk in behind me but Sir Paul McCartney. Well, well. Good to see some old friends, particularly Tal. /me waves.

Labels: friends, music, pre-school

Piano and Avatar time

(backposting) I was in charge of the music for the final Communion service of the weekend, so chose the hymns and played the piano. It was lots of fun, and there were some stonking hymns. I think I must have spent too much time with those Methodists on ERMC, because I discovered that morning (having chosen them around a week earlier) that 3 of the 4 were by Charles Wesley. At least he was an Anglican.

The girls weren't going to be back home until the evening, so I decided that after a long hard week and weekend, I deserved a treat. Avatar 3D. Did the shopping first, thereby assuaging possible guilt, and then sat down to watch it, in a fairly full cinema. It's very impressive, and utterly believable, in terms of the visual effects. Not a stunning good plot or very complex character development, but a good film, I have to say, and I'm very glad I saw it in 3D.

Girls half woke up when they turned up in the car (well, Moo was very awake, particularly after her hour-long diversion given the closure of the A14), so I got to say "I love you", give them each a kiss and put them both to bed. Ah.

And great to catch up with Moo, too.

Labels: films, music

Carols by torchlight

Tonight was Halstead's town carol service. We started at the top of town, and were marched down the town by the Salvation Army Band. We formed up at the park, and sang carols by torchlight in the park. It was great, and felt really Christmasy, so the the season's really started for me now.

Labels: Christmas, church, music

Project, and off home

The day of the great project presentation. We'd been asked to present to the company, and anyone who wanted to do so could turn up. This included some pretty senior people, some very bright technical folks, some sales folks with serious experience, and one of the founders of the company. And it went really, really well. We rocked: we really, really did. And this despite our team song ending up being MC Hammer's "U Can't Touch This."

Lunch - another milkshake! - and then to the airport. I'm sitting in an airport lounge, finally getting up to date with the blog, and looking forward to heading home. The only concern is that I'm so tired that I might fall asleep here, and miss my flight, so that's why I'm keeping myself busy and typing away. I feel that I've made the right move, that I known what I'm doing, that I'm going to enjoy my job, and that this is a goer. Thank God.

Labels: music, travel, work

Ordination and first Eucharist

(backposting) So much to blog about. So much. But I'm still processing it, so I'll put down what I can.

Ordination

We arrived at the church early, and it was lovely to greet people as they arrived. I had problems letting go, and not being the curate: there were other people to sort things out, and in the end, I just had to be an ordinand, get ready, and go with it. I robed up in cassock, surplice and white alb - a beautiful 18th century white alb that Dad had been given for his priesting, and which he passed on to me. We formed up in the St Andrew's Centre car park, and then walked over to the church. Moo was my lay sponsor, and I held her hand as we processed up the aisle together. There's a fair amount of preamble - all of it important - before the actual act of ordination, and I was the third of the 3 to be ordained, but in the end my time came. I knelt in front of the bishop, and the clergy clustered round and laid their hands on me. There were 10, I think: the bishop, the bishop's chaplain (Tim), the preacher (Chris), my father, my incumbent (John), Geoff (from the team), Viv (from the team), Mark and Ian's incumbents and James (a good friend, and previously from the team). Moo says it was a big of a scrum, but I couldn't tell. As the bishop said the words, it felt heavy, and I felt surrounded, and it was good. And then, I was a priest. The bishop anointed Ian's hands, then Mark's, and then mine, and we were done.

The service moved into a Eucharist, and we stood to either side of the bishop as he presided. After we'd taken communion from him, we got to sit down and just relax a bit. The service finished, the bishop took us three, new priests, down the aisle, and it was over, and time for some pictures.

First Eucharist

The parish put together a fabulous bring and share lunch: what lovely people. I had a chance to catch up with a few of them, but also friends and family. Leo, Rosie and Andy, Mark and Jenny, Mum and Dad, of course, Aunty Les and others, too. Si and D arrived in time for the 1500 Eucharist, as did Gary with his family, which I'd not expected. I walked the main players - Dad (serving for me), Sally (reading the Gospel) and Ian (preaching) - through the choreography first, and then it was time to start.

It was an immensely emotional experience for me. Mum later said that the first time she'd seen me cry in church was 31 years ago, and she thought she'd see it again, and it was close. Some of the liturgy, a couple of the hymns, and also parts of Byrd 4-part all had me close to tears. But when it came to the two parts which mattered the most to me - the Absolution and the Eucharistic prayer - it all worked. I'd been worried about the Absolution, but it felt right. Even more so for the Eucharistic prayer. I'd spent a lot of time preparing, and in particular thinking about the actions and gestures that I'd be using, before deciding to go with pretty much the bare minimum. I was boiling in a warm chasuble in a very warm church (Catherine had needed to call an ambulance for a member of the congregation at the ordination service - though I'd not noticed! - and the afternoon was hotter), we had a gospel procession, a Latin mass setting, and pretty "high" setting, but the theology is pretty low for me.

When it came to the prayer of institution, it just felt right to be saying it. And I was just aware that I was not the first person to be saying these words and celebrating this feast, but was part of a long tradition, made up of many, many others. It was just right. And Dad hadn't realised that he would be the first person to whom I administered communion, and that was very special indeed.

Our last hymn was "Jerusalem": a mission hymn. And, although not everyone enjoyed it, we had my favourite piece of organ music: "Dieu parmi nous" (God among us) by Olivier Messiaen. We sat, rather than processed, and it was the perfect end to my first communion.

Aftermath

We finished the day with friends coming back for a barbecue - during which it rained very, very hard. Si and D with Morgan and Boo, James and Ruth and Sally all came, and John and Mo arrived later as the others were departing, giving us a good chance for a chat with them. The girls pleaded tiredness around 1900 and we put them to bed without even a bath, and they were down so quickly that we had a good long time to chat. A good end to a long day, and we went to be tired.

Only for Jo to turn up with a temperature (I took her into the spare room with me) and Miri to go in with Moo, having been woken by Jo's perambulations. Such is life.

Labels: church, eucharist, family, friends, music, ordination

Clergy lunch

(backposting) Tomorrow, the retreat begins, so today is a day to get things sorted. I worked on a CD for my first Eucharist, and took it into church to listen to, but it didn't work so well, so I'll have to find an alternative way of doing it - hopefully I can find the original CDs and use those. After that, we had a team clergy lunch, most of which was not actually lunch, but the team walking through the choreography of the ordination service for Sunday.

Just as we were sitting down to lunch, the plumber called, so I had to eat quickly and head off home. We now have 3 working loos, rather than one and a half (no, really). This is an improvement.

Labels: clergy, music

Going for a run

(backposting) It's been quite a while since I went for a run. But today I did, to the soundtrack of The Prodigy. It didn't hurt as much as I'd thought it might, as I've been taking lots of other exercise, and so I didn't need any of the excuses that I'd been preparing before I headed off. Not running that much faster than I tend to walk, but it's a different type of exercise, and that's all good.

I spent some of the evening inviting people to my ordination and 1st Eucharist on Sunday, 28th June - if you'd like to come, and I've not been in touch, please let me know.

Labels: exercise, music

Supervision and singing

I had a supervision with John, my incumbent, today. It was a six-month review, and I think we're both pretty happy with how things are going. This is great news, because it took some real compromise and pain when we were setting up the agreements. Also, we've got through more of the pieces in the training agreement than I think either of us had expected, which is quite a relief. Not to say there's not a lot more to do - there is - but it's going well.

This evening, I attended choir practice, as we'll be performing Cornelius' "Three Kings" on the 25th, as part of the 1000 service. We found a good place to sing from, with really nice acoustics. The choir did well, as they'd only had one chance to look at it before.

Labels: curacy, music

Bury St Edmunds

Went to Bury today with the girls and Moo, and met Mel and her mum, Trisha. Unluckily, there's an excellent wool shop there, which Moo now knows about. We also took the girls to the cathedral, where the choir - or a choir - was rehearsing. The top line (women) were very good, though there was a rather ropey tenor around, but I realised how much I miss choral music - live choral music. I've been promising myself for ages that I'll somehow find a way to get to more services with good music, but I can't see how it's going to happen in the near future. Maybe when Jo and Miri are a little older I can start taking them to cathedral services from time to time.

For now, I'll just have to take what I can get.

Labels: music

Just because

Labels: music

Ska-ed for (everlasting) life

I couldn't resist the pun. Or the addition. I'm sorry.

I'm not much of a devotee of Christian pop/rock at the best of times, but this has opened my eyes. There's a whole new subgenre that I'm suddenly interested in exploring. I'm wondering if we can book them for our next Family Eucharist. Or whether I can do a stealth booking for Gary's church.

Labels: church, humour, music

I spy, with my little eye...

... something beginning with "buh" (me).

Bong? (Jo)

(Whoops...)

... something beginning with "cuh" (Moo)

Kraftwerk? (Jo)

(In fact, we suspect she said "craftwork", but we were both seriously impressed with our daughter's nascent musical interests.)

Labels: Jo, music

More retreat

(backposting) There are (as I've already mentioned) lots of services on the retreat. Four today: Morning Prayer (0800), Holy Communion (1200), Evening Prayer (1800) and Night Prayer (Compline), following an address at 2000. There's lots of space during the day to do your thing, and as well as reading some trashy novels to relax, I've also been doing some interesting theological reading. I have to note that the Homilies have got some pretty anti-Romish sentiment in them.

Anyway, to get back to the point, with each service there's a hymn or song. Luckily, there are two of us who play, and from very different backgrounds. I'm taking the standard traditional-type hymns, and Geoff has been handling the "songs", or less traditional ones. He's a star. Jazz piano where he comes from, and his "Amazing Grace" was brilliant, and gave me a chance to have a seriously good sing.

Although I'm very aware that life isn't easy for Moo when I'm away like this, but I think it's really important to take the time to concentrate on the ordination, and the journey that I've had getting there, not to mention taking some time to allow work to dissipate a little.

Labels: music, ordination, services

Good idea

Jo in the bath: Mummy, will you sing me the song about the dead people?
Moo (also in the bath): what?
Jo: the one with with the dead people.
Moo: what do you mean?
Jo: about going to sleep.
Moo: do you mean a lullaby?
Jo: yes. About the dead people.
Moo: ah. It's not _really_ about dead people.

It turns out she meant Kate Rusby's beautiful Who will sing me lullabies. I probably didn't need to explain about the subject matter when it came on the CD in the car the other day.

Jo came through with Moo as I was putting Miri to bed, singing quietly to her. "Good idea," said Jo.

On the subject of music, I thought that Jo was fond of music, but it's nothing to how Miri feels about it. She'll sing along to anything: dance, play, clap, everything. In fact, if you want to make her happy, put some music on your mobile phone, change it to loudspeaker, and let her hold it. You'll be handed it back from time to time, but not for long. Favourites range from Finzi's "God is gone up" to Messiaen's "Dieu Parmi Nous" via some bluegrass and the Benny Hill chase music "Yakety Sax".

If you don't know Kate Rusby, take the time to listen to some of her music. Here's another beautiful but devastating song: My Young Man. It's got a brass band on it, so it pretty much _has_ to be great.

Labels: music

The Choir

We watched the last episode of The Choir on BBC2 tonight. They performed in the Albert Hall.

From time to time I watch something like this, and feel the applause washing over. It's like a drug, and I can't believe I don't have it anymore. I cried.

Labels: music

"A frustrated professional musician"

(backposting) A very interesting URC worship service in the morning, then more work on the music, including a discussion. It was wide-ranging, but we got quite hung up on the question of how to reconcile the desire for the highest quality music (and worship for God) with the wish to include people of varying abilities. I really struggle, these days, with singing in Christmas choirs, and decline the invitation, usually. I don't mind listening, but there are times when I want to create the very best I can. I struggle with the fact that it's difficult to explain that I feel pain when not worshipping to the best of what I can achieve, just as someone may feel pain when they feel excluded from music making. Brenda, a professional musician on the course who will give up a large part of that when she's ordained, discussed this in some depth with me, and it was she who said "you're a frustrated professional musician".

I think she's right. Although I made a very conscious decision not to become a musician, and I think it was a good one, there come times in our lives when we realise how big those decisions were. I have very little opportunity for high-standard music-making at the moment, and I really miss it: particularly when I _do_ get the chance, which I have done on this course, in particular with the madrigal group. I really don't think I realised what good musicians we were at King's, and actually how good a musician I have the capability of being, thanks be to God. But it's a burden, too...

Had feedback on my service yesterday morning from Cathy, on the staff. Very helpful, and generally positive, which I'm pleased about.

A discusssion on the church in "cyberspace" (yuck), at which we talked at length about SecondLife and the Anglican Cathedral there. People raised some very good questions, quite a few of which I had no answers to.

Final rehearsals for tomorrow's Review...

Oh, and Andrew and I saw a Merlin today, which had killed and was protecting a dead blackbird. What a privilege!

Labels: ERMC, music

"Bring your Methodist Worship Books"

(backposting) I had, over the past few days, announced rather too often (4 times?) over meals that people should remember to bring their Methodist Worship Books to Morning Prayer, and had started to be mocked for it. This, however, didn't bother me, and when it came down to it, there were lots in evidence, so it had worked. So there.

I was leading the service, and had rehearsed "Ghimel" (just the title, not the main bit) with the same group of singers for the madrigals, which we performed in the ante-chapel just before starting the service. We did well, apart from my screwing up a lead. Oh, well. I'd decided to make the service about affirming vocation, as this was half-way through the week for some of us, but only a few hours in for the new first years, and everyone was a bit shell-shocked. We had the Commissioning of Aaron and the "Holy Nation, Royal Priesthood" piece from 1 Peter, and during the intercessions, I encouraged people to pray for themselves chiefly, as we have lots of prayers for other people, but not always enough for ourselves. I asked people to stay at the end for some organ music, and hit them with the last 3 minutes of "Dieu Parmi Nous" by Messiaen, which always blows me away. Not everyone liked it, but everyone who I spoke to seemed to have engaged with it.

After breakfast, we had an excellent session on Visual Arts through the ages by a visiting speaker, Neil. I ended up next to a student with a significant visual impairment, and as pictures came up on the screen, tried to describe what I was seeing. It was fascinating thinking about how all she could see (with the exception of a few pieces of work like a couple of Rothko paintings) was what I described to her, and it really made me think about what I was seeing in a new light. She said that she learnt lots about me, which was unsurprising!

In the afternoon, a session learning "Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring" with a bunch of singers of various abilities, ready to discuss the process tomorrow. Course photograph after supper, followed by a pub quiz. Our team won. Big surprise, but lots of wine as a prize. All gone within the hour...

Labels: art, ERMC, music, worship

Music, new students

(backposting) The theme for much of today was how the Gospel and music have inter-related through Western culture over the ages. The day started with a BCP Mattins led by someone who'd never done one before, and had only participated in BCP services on ERMC weekends and summer schools: it's just not his tradition. He did a fantastic job, and I enjoyed the service very much. This rather set the tone of the day: lots of music and discussion about it which was great. We watched an excellent DVD about Bach (J.S.), with lots of excerpts, very well performed, and I really felt at home. The discussion we had later included a number of short pieces from the group, including Iain's wife, Beth, singing and playing a lovely song that she wrote herself, and which we listened through twice as we were so moved by it. It's on a CD of music performed by Westcott students, and I'd like to get a copy of it.

The new students arrived today, and one of them, Celia, is ex-Cambridge, and knew a bunch of King's choral scholars who I also knew or knew of. Lots of shared history, including the Chetwynd Society (debating or drinking...?). Hmmm!

Labels: ERMC, music

Sunday, the day of rest

(backposting) Not if you're on an ERMC summer school, it's not! A Methodist communion - wow, all those little cups of non-wine! - at 0730 (ow!), then breakfast, then more discussion on films. After that, another Ian and Richard double-act, this time discussing post-Christendom. Have to admit that I had a bit of a dose through some of this, as the historical stuff wasn't new to me.

Free time in the afternoon - again, laughable, because there was more choir rehearsal. Much, much better, the Tye, and ready for performing at this evening's worship.

In the afternoon, a session on literature, which focused rather oddly on A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian, which I'm afraid I hadn't got round to reading (I wasn't alone). Lots of education on post-structuralist and deconstructionist theory, which should be a good underpinning for the rest of the week.

At one point, one of the students, who's firmly from a more evangelical tradition than me, said, "As a Christian theologian, we accept the authority of the Bible...", and I took it up with him later on. I absolutely can't make a blanket statement like that. I have to look at any such acceptance, _particularly_ of the Bible, critically, and when it comes down to it, I find that it's my faith that is the bedrock of my Christianity, shored up by the Bible, and not really the other way round. This isn't a new thing for me, and it's an issue that I grapple with, but it's one that I'm very happy that I _do_ grapple with. It's one of the concerns I used to have about how many scientists at university took to evangelical Christianity: when they're so used to probing and questioning in their own lines of work, how can they be so uncritical in just accepting the Bible (and a rather narrow set of interpretations thereof)? An _uncritical_ sola scriptura just doesn't hold it for me.

The Tye went well, despite a missed alto entry, which we salvaged quickly, and no-one was the wiser. I was very pleased, and lots of people said how much they'd enjoyed it: both choir and congregation.

Labels: bible, ERMC, music, worship