Wednesday, March 14, 2007
The Spirit of the Lord is upon me
This month's synchroblog is on "Altered states of consciousness", and how they relate to Christianity. In my undergraduate days, I did some interesting work on women religious (that is nuns, anchorites, etc.) in the Middle Ages, and read the excellent Holy Feast and Holy Fast: The Religious Significance of Food to Medieval Women by Caroline Walker Bynum. It talked about the possible use of fasting - and anorexia - as part of their lives, and the possibility that some visions were brought on by side effects of this. If I remember correctly, it wasn't discounting the visions, just setting them in context. This, however, is pretty much all I know on the subject. So I decided to talk from personal experience a bit. This is my blog, after all.A bit of background on me first. I come from a liberal, medium-to-high church background. Hymns, and if we sing any "worship songs", we still call them hymns, organ and choir (when available, in both cases), not guitars. Nothing extravagant - for some people, passing the Peace is a step too far. That sort of thing. It doesn't mean that there's not true worship going on, or a very real spirituality, but it tends to be internalised. Now, I've always found music very moving, and maybe I'm being a little harsh on the tradition I come from, but there are limits. I'm _certainly_ not the sort of person to go in for visions, or voices, or any of that sort of thing. Oh, no.
Which makes it somewhat embarassing when it happens to me. Three times in my life, so far:
- first, when I was receiving communion a few weeks after I was confirmed (around the age of 11): I had my eyes closed, and as I received the bread, I saw Jesus giving it to me, rather than the person who was serving me. I've always interpreted this as a sign that God was likely to call me to the priesthood at some point
- second, three Easters ago when I attended a communion service, and felt that I was hardly there at all: God was speaking to me very directly. I came out of that service realising that I was being called to a vocation, and that the time was now. This led, in time, to a realisation that the earlier call was being taken up, and that it was time to investigate ordination
- third, while I was listening to some music and reading in the library at Ditchingham, on an ERMC residential: I suddenly felt the hand of God upon me, and really felt that "The Spirit of the Lord is upon me". I wrote this up in my blog last August, and rather than going into the details again, I include the link: God be thanked. This was an affirming and strengthening for the time ahead.
I would describe all of these as taking place within an altered state of consciousness, as a realisation of God's grace (not always easy - the second experience was challenging and unsettling, for instance) fell upon me. I sometimes use meditation techniques to aid my prayer-life, too. What I think I'm trying to say is that you don't have to go all "weirdy-beardy", or "charismatic" or "happy-clappy" to experience God's grace through your life. You may feel touched without any of that, and if your consciousness is altered, it's because God's changed how you think, feel, and relate to the world. The immediate feeling may wear off - for me, that's true - but hopefully the experience will act as a touchstone, and the changes that God wrought in you will be reflected in your life.
I'd just like to say that I'm not condemning in any way the "charimatic", "happy clappy", or even the "weirdy-beardy" (!), but trying to make it clear that you shouldn't reject a call or an experience just because it doesn't hit you as you expect. Nor should you be worried. Engage, analyse, if you wish, be fearful of what the experience means. But the experience can come even to "staid", "safe" - dare I say it? - "boring" Christians like me.
Synchroblog
Today is a "synchroblog" on the subject of spiritual warfare. If you've liked what you read here, or, more particularly, if you didn't, and you'd like to read some other opinions, please visit one of the other participating blogs:- Shamanic Vision and Apocalyptic Scripture at Phil Wyman's Square No More
- Can prayer be an example of Alternate Conciousness? at Eternal Echoes
- Better Than I Was [at times], Not Better Than You Are by Mike of Earthsea
- emotionalism vs rationalism at Adam Gonnerman's Igneous Quill
- Consciousness of the absurd and the absurdity of consciousness at Steve's Notes from the Underground
- The Unconscious Christian by Matt Stone
- Hypnochristians at Jamie's More Than Stone
- The extreme consciousness of the Spirit by Les Chatwin
- The Spirit of the Lord is upon me at Mike's Musings
- The Truth About Reality by David Fisher at Be the Revolution
- Trying to play along here at Cindy's Tracking the Edge
- Entranced Prayer at Journeys In Between
Labels: ERMC, spirituality, vocation
You sat and grinned from ear to ear and the presence of the Holy Spirit's hand upon you was tangiable to folk sitting near you... echoes of 2 Corinthians 3:7-18 here... ( go read it).
Am I right in thinking that you'd been reading Althus-Reid at the time? Something significant there!
My experience, though, is that the more I sought personal 'manifestations', the less I thought of the poor and hurting. I suppose there's a balance somewhere....
Anyway, great post, and I appreciate your honesty!
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